My Journey into Love

I'm sitting here on my couch laughing thinking about all the times I've worried about things I had no control over.  I've even felt bad about how much I struggle to give over everything to God.  Striving, stress, control, all so heavy and unnecessary.  I'm reminded of where God says "his yoke is easy and his burden is light".  I've been hearing the Spirit whisper those words to me over and over again over the past few days.  I talked to a friend the other day and admitted that I deal with this struggle to not stress and control and I almost cried with how he responded.  All he basically said was that he deals with the same thing.  He could have said "come on Carrie think about how big God is" or "clearly you don't have enough faith, you just need to pray more and read your bible more".  Instead he was just authentic that he has the same struggle.  How crazy refreshing to have someone admit that they too are in process and learning how to let go of control and how to love God and themselves.

I love to think about the "what ifs".  I need to sometimes to get right perspective.  What if I never opened my bible again ?  Would that change how God feels about me ?  What if I was never intentional about praying for people to be healed so they can experience the unfathomable love of God ? Would that be enough to change how God feels about me ?  Even as I write this I feel more duty/obligation falling off of me.  "His yoke is easy and His burden is light".  I can only speak based on the encounters with His love/presence that I've had, but I can tell you that any time I've come to Him he is lifting off all of that law.  Does He want us to want Him ?  More than anything !!! We are His obsession.  He longs to draw us into Him and love on us.  Does it touch His heart when we force ourselves to "seek" Him when our hearts aren't in it ?  I don't know, but I'd like to propose something.   I know that if a friend called me and said " wanna hang out - I haven't talked to you in a week and I'm feeling bad because I know I should hang out with you" I would feel like please don't bother.  I've been praying that God would help me to love him well.  The love that He pours out on us is so extravagant and our response isn't demanded it's longed for.  I've heard lots of teaching on the first and two greatest commandments and how we should live based on these.  Jesus death fulfilled the law including these two commandments.  So what are we left with - His crazy longing for us !  What if you found out that someone thinks about you more than twice a second ?

I promise there's science behind that : ).  What if that same person found out you were going to die and you were cut off from relationship with you Father, so he died so that you could live and have relationship with your Father.  Are you starting to fall in love yet ?  I am.  Not only that but he left the earth to build a kingdom that is brilliant and amazing for both of you to share forever.  He also left His best friend the Holy Spirit to be your friend while he's creating this amazing place for you !  Wow so what am I left to do.  Fall in love over and over again.  Here I am learning to love, learning to trust, starting to understand a part of "the breadth, width, height, and depth of the love of God which surpasses knowledge".  I love this journey !!!    Let Him love you and watch how easily you start to look like Him, talk like Him, and act like Him !!!